Dang, how did Valentine’s Day sneak up on us so fast? We just finished Mardi Gras, does anyone really care about it but Hallmark? Seems I only cared about Valentines’ Day when I was alone on it – it sucked. It seemed hubby was deployed or away most Valentine’s Day. However, he always sent me a really nice gift. Now that he doesn’t travel for work anymore, I don’t expect anything but a kiss and maybe a sappy cards. The kids will get a little sumthin sumthin and I have to do class cards for Princess Whinalot and candy for the boys to hand out in class.
I think I found the most unique Valentine’s gift this year! Despair, Inc. has Conversational Hearts called Bittersweets – with their own sick twist! They have 3 groups: dejected, dysfunctional and dumped. Bwahahaha, the site also says, “Supplies are limited. But the pain that accompanies them may not be.” They come in six different flavors: Banana Chalk, Grape Dust, Nappy-Citric, You-Call-This-Lime?, Pink Sand and Fossilized Antacid.
1. “Dejected” sayings include: I MISS MY EX, PEAKED AT 17, MAIL ORDER, TABLE FOR 1, I CRY ON Q, U C MY BLOG?, LOSS LEADER, A FINE WHINE, MOMMY ISSUES, DIGNITY, FREE, DORK MAGNET, PURE NAUSEA, WE HAD PLANS, MAIL ORDER, SETTLE 4LESS, I’M HOT INSIDE
2. “Dysfunctional” sayings include: ANNULMENT, I BEEN CREEPIN, HE CAN LISTEN, GAME ON TV, CALL A 900#, P.S. I LUV ME , DO MY DISHES, BOOTY INFL8N, PAROLE IS UP!, AWFUL INLAWS, SUB PRIM, I WANT HALF, RETURN 2 PIT, NO FIX 4 DUMB, RATHER DRINK, MUTUAL DISGUST
3. “Dumped” sayings include: I GOT SOBER, HE FIT U FAT, U LEFT SEATUP, USED U 4 FUN, JUST A FRIEND, BACK 2 KENNEL, DORKA PHOBIC, U HAVE A BLOG, RUSSIAN BRIDE, CELEB8 THX2U, DOG IS CUTER, TRADIN YOU IN, FORGET WE MET, KISS A FROG, SHE IS 22!, HE HAS A JOB
I leave you with a sick MAD TV Valentine skit