Remember that episode from “King of Queens” when Doug drags Carrie to a Home Repair store to try and find “couple friends” without kids? Well, we have decided we either (1) need to convince all our friends to get boats (2) get a bigger boat (3) buy a waverunner so we can fit more friends on the boat or (4) get new friends that already have boats! Yes, we are actively searching for families in their 40s (give or take 10 years) with a boat and 3 children the same ages as ours. Bwahahaha!

Woot Woot, the the boats engine started right away this year! We shoved off at about 10:30 from the Madisonville boat ramp. This is the first time we paid the $5 to launch and it was well worth the money – way better launch than the free one and we actually could park our trailer within 2 miles afterwards! The kids begged us to first head to the Tchefuncte (still sounds like a bad word to me) River Beach. For those of you who have never been to this remote private island (snicker), it is a strip of beach at the end of the Tchefuncte River where it meets Lake Pontchartrain. We arrived real early with brand new shovels & pails (old ones all beat to a pulp ad cracked) and the kids ran amok for an hour on the deserted beach! Then we went tubing on the lake and came back an hour later for lunch and – it was packed!!!!

I jokingly called it the Redneck Riviera and hubby laughed. Really, there were people of all walks of life. And people will be boat poor. I called it that, because it is really a tiny strip of beach with (fake or real sand- you decide) that everyone makes a spot to hang or meet up others. Pretty much everyone there was drinking beer and eating PB&J sandwiches while kids were building sand castles and playing in the water and there was no bathroom in sight! But, there were a lot of people making short trips beyond their boat in knee deep water EWWWW!

Hubby has that man gene that gave him “BOAT ENVY” the whole time we were there. Because, of course, everyone has a bigger and better boat than our 19′ Nitro (The Kiss My Gumbo). First, we pulled up next to this professional fisherman (big mistake) who was testing the props for his new boat sponsored by M&M’s – hubby estimated 100K. I had to tell him to close his mouth because drool was literally pouring out. Then he bummed out that we didn’t bring fishing gear today. Then, all the serious boats seemed to surround us that were still small enough to beach themselves (the bigger ones anchor off shore and have to swim to the beach) nananabooboo. Too funny, we all flock to this tiny strip of beach like it is a 5 star oasis with umbrella drinks being served, our chairs being turned to face the sun on the hour and of course, full bathroom facilities readily available!

Morning on the Tchefuncte Redneck Riviera

Afternoon on the Tchefuncte Redneck Riviera (and this is only April)

Really, who needs to live on the ocean when you have Lake Pontchartrain? It has everything and more that a water-loving person could want (including bull sharks). And how many other states are still stuck in Winter while we are working on their tans? This is the best place ever!

**Thank you for reading and you can catch this post and others on NOLA.com & Kiss My Gumbo.com! Tomorrow I have a funny and informative piece about cell phones coming your way – don’t miss it!